Daydreaming, Freud and Bhakti Yoga

May, 2011 with Matt Laughlin

Personally, I don't know too many monks. Though I do know a number of people who daydream, on occasion, about leading the life of a monk, myself once included.

If you haven't felt drawn to the serene, pressure-free life of a monk, just bring to mind your own daydream equivalent. Perhaps it is some kind of retreat center getaway in a tropical setting, a natural mountain top lifestyle of some kind. Maybe it is a more active vision, doing something you love in an ideal place you wish to live.

Daydreaming is related to the ego defense mechanism of fantasy.

Retreating into fantasy serves as an indirect way to deal with inner conflict, or perhaps resistance to engaging in the world as it is, within the circumstances of one's life. In its more extreme forms, fantasy can reflect the presence of a narcissistic personality disorder, or a significant depression characterized by magical thinking and adolescent coping mechanisms.

Rest assured that daydreaming isn't as serious as the defense mechanism of fantasy.

In actuality, daydreams may reveal a kernel of truth and beauty within yourself that you would be well served to bring further into your awareness.

I came across a commentary by Freud on the valuable nature of daydreams, which, in his words, "include a great deal of the true constitutional essence of the subject's personality" and may, through great effort on the part of the daydreamer, be turned into a tangible reality or artistic creation rather than remain a limitation.

While I don't know many monks, I do know a lot of people who, regardless of the circumstances of their life, deep down are inspired by some kind of spiritual ideal. I use the phrase 'spiritual ideal' broadly. For some this may be an attraction to the intrinsic beauty of nature, for others to being of loving service, and for others seeking to experience the presence of God within.

Freud would most definitely part ways with the idea that our most cherished daydreams might represent an inner spiritual ideal we consciously or unconsciously project onto the world. This idea, in contrast, is more in accord with the great traditions of yoga, most principally, Bhakti Yoga, the so called 'religion of love.'

From the perspective of Bhakti Yoga that which people truly seek in all their daydreaming visions and worldly endeavors is their own inner ideal projected onto external objects.

Bhakti Yoga teaches that the fulfillment sought in relationships, idealized settings and activities all represent a search for the loving presence of the Higher Self within.

There is a beautiful prayer that captures this understanding as it applies to the search for the source of love in marriage:

"None, O beloved, loves the husband for the husband's sake; it is for the sake of the Self who is in the husband that the husband is loved. None, O beloved, loves the wife for the wife's sake; it is for the sake of the Self who is in the wife that the wife is loved." - Swami Vivekananda

Chasing after our daydreams and externalized ideals in life and relationship is inevitable. But from the perspective of Bhakti Yoga we are also reminded that these efforts represent an early stage and are but limited representations of a Higher Love that remains within ourselves, whether we seek for it directly or not.

Freud states that daydreams may represent the "constitutional essence of the subject's personality." Bhakti Yoga suggests that daydreams represent an externalized search for what is already present within. The loss of most anything meaningful presents us with the opportunity to discover the truth of this.

I went through a difficult period in my mid twenties following two ankle surgeries and an inability to trail run as I had done for years. A principle source of joy seemed lost to me. While running in nature is a joy in its own right, it was only after I discovered the source of joy within that I ceased daydreaming about it as though it were lost.

Psychologically or spiritually, we are well served to bring the essence of our daydreaming to light. The next time you catch yourself daydreaming, it might be worthwhile to contemplate what it is these visions represent, and what it is you truly seek.

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