Who inspires you most in life?

April, 2011 by Matt Laughlin

I can barely get through reading a few paragraphs of the late Swami Vivekananda without feeling a jolt of inspiration reverberate through my heart.

Vivekananda was an influential teacher who introduced Vedanta and Hinduism to the West in the late 19th century. He had a tremendous sense of reverence for the innate truth and wisdom at the heart all the worlds' major faith traditions, despite their limitations, and is famous for his opening remarks at "The World's Parliament of Religions" held in Chicago in 1893.

Taking the stage after several other religious representatives had already spoken he opened his arms wide and addressed the audience as "Sisters and Brothers of America." It is recorded that thousands in the audience rose and applauded for several minutes before taking their seats, moved by a man who "spoke to them with the natural and candid warmth of a brother."

Why am I writing about Vivekananda?

The central focus of this article is on the psychological and spiritual importance of having inspiring figures in our life that reflect back to us our highest potential. As a psychotherapist or life coach, one of the most psychologically diagnostic and significant things to learn about a person is who inspires them most in life - what is their highest ideal? Vivekananda spoke eloquently on this topic.

"We must have the highest ideal. Unfortunately, in this world the vast majority of persons are groping in the dark without any ideal at all. If a man with an ideal makes a thousand mistakes, I am sure that the man without and ideal makes fifty thousand. Therefore it is better to have an ideal. And this ideal we must hear about as much as we can, till it enters into our hearts, into our brains, into our very veins, till it tingles in every drop of our blood and permeates every pore in our body. We must meditate upon it. "Out of the fullness of the heart the mouth speaketh," and out of the fullness of the heart, the hands work, too." (London, October 27, 1896)

To me, asking someone what their "highest ideal is in life" is a question that takes some digesting and contemplation.

Instead, it can be equally helpful to invite people to talk about some of the most inspiring people in their lives - whether family members, friends, historical figures, teachers, business associates, or even great figures in literature and film. I always ask what are the qualities each figure embodies that you find especially inspiring?

Qualities are timeless and impersonal. You may never work a tractor like your grandfather, but you can certainly reflect the dedication, perseverance and gentle nature you admired in him in the affairs of today's world.

The way a person speaks about those who inspire them says more about their core values than any impersonal questionnaire. It also suggests where they seek to grow.

But sometimes people struggle to answer this question. They may not have been fortunate enough to have healthy parenting, and in turn, lack so called positive "ego-ideals;" those values modeled by our parents which influence our personalities later in life. They may be struggling with depression, which makes it even more difficult to genuinely feel inspired by something outside oneself, much less within.

Nevertheless, in such cases I still find that as people take time to reflect, journal and most especially talk about individuals who have moved them, forgotten Angels of their past come to mind. And with that spark of recollection, a powerful process of self-discovery resumes.

The importance of having a higher ideal

Why is it so important to reflect on inspiring figures in our life? For one, it reveals the scope and vision one has for their own self.

Psychiatrist David R. Hawkins, captures this in his statement: "Until one acknowledges the intrinsic genius within oneself, one will have great difficulty recognizing it in others - we can only acknowledge without what we realize within."

Who inspires you most suggests not only what you are able to acknowledge within yourself, but also the scope of vision you hold as possible in your own life.

If an "ego-ideal" is important in childhood development how much more important is it to have a spiritual-ideal in one's adult life?

Vivekananda has this to say on the topic..

"We talk of principles, we think of theories, and that is all right; but every thought and every movement, every one of our actions, shows that we can only understand a principle when it comes to us through a person. We can only grasp an idea when it comes to us through a concrete ideal person. We can only understand the precept through the example. Would to God that all of us were so developed that we did not require any example, did not require any persons. But that we are not; and naturally the vast majority of mankind has put their souls at the feet of these extraordinary personalities, the Prophets, the Incarnations of God - Incarnations worshipped by the Christians, by the Buddhists, and by the Hindus." (Pasadena, CA, Feb 3, 1900)

Three ideas to assist you in examining the sources of inspiration in your life...

1. Differentiate compensation from inspiration.

In the psychotherapeutic process often individuals discover entire areas of their life which are shaped in response to a real or imagined limitation of their personality or physicality. Their seeming ideal is often a compensation, a defense of the ego rather than an inspiration arising within their heart. Shaping our ideals as a means to compensate for a perceived defect or lack within ourselves is a dispiriting process, and leads nowhere. In contrast, when you start from inspiration you start with a recognition that your highest Self, your essence, is not limited or lacking, despite your perspectives of yourself. When you commit your life to the fulfillment of a spiritual ideal that moves your heart, you're better equipped to handle the ordinary and everyday limitations of being human. Aligning your life with something higher brings joy and peacefulness.

2. Welcome mistakes. I cannot state this more beautifully than Vivekananda:

"Never mind failures; they are quite natural. They are the beauty of life, these failures. What would life be without them? It would not be worth having if it were not for struggles. Where would be the poetry of life? Never mind the struggles, the mistakes. I never heard a cow tell a lie; but it is only a cow - not a man. So never mind these failures, these backslidings; hold to the ideal a thousand times, and if you fail a thousand times, make the attempt once more." (London, October 27, 1896)

3. Act on the qualities that move you most.

Among atheists and theists alike, it is rare to meet someone who doesn't appreciate the qualities embodied by The Buddha, Christ or many other great teachers of history. Kindness, generosity and lovingness are qualities that speak timelessly to the heart. Who inspires you most, and what qualities do they embody that especially call your attention? What would it look like to act from that quality in your own life?

Final thoughts...

Seeking to fulfill your highest ideal is no selfish endeavor. It is revealing to recognize just how much one's life is shaped and uplifted by the inspiring example of others. As you do your part to fulfill your highest ideals you become a light for others to do the same.

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